How to Have a Vacation-Style Love Life Without Leaving Your Home
Make the most of being in lockdown.
You’ve been safely confined to the comfort of your own home for how long now? About a month at least, right? And since you’ve had to re-organize much of your life because of the coronavirus pandemic, some things have likely been compromised. Travel is obviously one of them. Another not-so-obvious one might be intimacy. But these are two activities that really make life worth living, so when they’re affected, it’s a problem. Especially when they go so well together! What makes vacation sex so exciting? Well, for starters, you’re away and you’re stimulated. You’re exploring a new place, there’s no day-to-day grind holding you down, you’re rolling in fresh, crisp hotel sheets, you’re drinking margaritas with a really nice couple you met on the flight—sexy stuff! Obviously, it’s not recommended to travel right now. But sex is still on the table, and since you have more time on your hands, you might be a bit randier than usual. It’s science! In a recent interview, Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a researcher at the Kinsey Institute, told Men’s Health that fear can definitely make us aroused. “When we’re in a heightened state of physiological arousal—when heart rate, breathing rate, and blood pressure rise—researchers have found that this has the potential to amplify sexual arousal,” Lehmiller said. So while you’re all riled up, here are a few ways to have vacation-quality sex (even though you may not physically be on a yacht in the Mediterranean). INSIDER TIPIf you don’t have or want a partner (or choose not to partake in intimate actions with them), you can absolutely ride solo. After all, if you can’t please yourself, how in the hell are you gonna please anybody else. Can I get an “amen”?
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The Right Page
First things first: There’s nothing sexier than someone who is on the same page as you, so make certain your partner has given full consent and is in agreement with you on this little “outing.”
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The Right Vacation
What do you typically find sexiest about a vacation? Perhaps it’s you and your loved one playing footsie in the sand as you watch the sun set at your favorite beach. Or, maybe it’s as simple as an oversized hotel suite bathroom. Whatever floats your boat! But, asking yourself these backdrop-related questions will be useful in establishing the mood. Describe the setting to your partner as you massage the back of their neck after everyone else has gone to bed. If you’re “staying” at a cabin in the woods at the moment, consider lighting a pine-scented candle or two and pull up “Crackling Mountain Campfire ” on YouTube after dinner to set the scene. If you’re at a food and wine festival for the weekend, everyone knows that taste testing makes for great foreplay, so open up your fridge and reenact that iconic scene from 9 ½ Weeks .
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The Right Equipment
As you know, while vacation can be synonymous with relaxation, it can also be a chance to try new things. Often times, experimenting in the bedroom can be helped by toys. Sex toy company Lelo is currently offering free delivery and has a quite a few deals—including the addition of a free plaything that can be controlled remotely via app to any purchase when you hit a minimum spend—going on as part of their “StayHome” campaign. Also, one of Lelo’s (more affordable) competitors, PinkCherry, has select products like the Mega Massager on sale for up to 50% off right now!
Alternately, how do you feel about erotic fiction ? Because you’re likely to spend less coins on a tacky yet juicy, compulsive read (start with something by Alessandra Torre, who has this genre down to a science) than you are a high-quality vibrator. Words on a page can be very powerful.
Don’t be afraid to let loose when it comes to dressing up, either, whether that’s jockstraps, lingerie, or even costumes—what better time to roleplay than on vacation?—if you’re planning for more of an adventurous trip.
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The Right Moment
Is it best to wait for the kids and/or roommates to fall asleep before you enter the spa (your bathroom)? Can you feasibly get up early enough to order breakfast in bed via “room service” which is expected to evolve into “turn down service”? It’s preferable to have as much time as possible to fulfill your fantasies, so avoid the busiest times of day.
If you’re suddenly feeling The Urge, and much like on vacation, you just want to get right down to business but you’re amongst others, let your lover know you’re ready to take this vacation ASAP—tell them you’d like to speak to them about something (consider using an unassuming tone) and head to a secure location in your house.
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The Right Location
When the moment lines up, don’t be afraid to get creative—head to your car and don’t rest at that rest stop (your garage); post up on that chaise lounge on the hotel balcony (that chair on your porch you never use) after a nightcap, and/or put on (and then take off!) your swimsuits before hopping into a Jacuzzi (bubble bath) with background vibes that are sure to assist you in your transport to Pleasuretown.
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The Right Position
Start with something manageable yet refreshing on your first trip and then gradually mix it up the more you become comfortable in these little outings; it’ll add another layer to an already adventurous situation. However, while trying something completely new is always exciting, the act of simply modifying one or two minor details—finding sweet nothings to whisper about or keeping your shoes on this time—while still sticking to methods you know will have the outcome in which you desire may just be enough; good for you!
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The Right Ending
Before you metaphorically turn that car around and make your way back, do something notable to signify the moment as special—that way, when you want to take another vacation in the (near) future, you have something to look forward to. Make a small meal, stargaze from your living room window, or take a giggly shower. Revel in the ecstasy longer than you normally would.
For Next Time
To ensure you’re up for the next vacation when that conversation does arise, take a few steps that may go a long way toward effective preparation. I’m talking about eating certain foods (avocados, almonds, chocolate, etc.) getting some form of regular exercise (even if it’s just pushups and sit-ups), and allowing your body to get at least seven hours of sleep a night. Also, remember that simple acts of kindness can go very far, so be just as considerate to your lover (and yourself!) outside of the bedroom: respect personal space, regularly dole out compliments, and do something that will make them smile on a daily basis.
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